How do you teach personal finance to boys who refuse to work, panic if they don’t have money, and spend every dime on gum and Pokemon cards? Still trying to navigate this “parent” thing, I haven’t yet found a successful, positive method of assigning chores, paying allowance, or discipline. Once I do, I’ll be sure and share it. However, I have discovered a great way to help encourage the boys to save money. [...] 
Unexpectedly, my carefully constructed fortress crumbled. Fears and anger, loss and blame poured out of me, unfortunately in the direction of my innocent husband. Soon, frustration became tears and a years worth of buried stress billowed out of me. I crumbled in the corner of the garage, perched on a paint-splattered stool, ripping open my soul. As I was spewed, I tried to stop myself, knowing it wasn’t fair and certainly not deserved; [...] 
I was sitting in the lobby of a neuropsych office, waiting on the boys, when I had one of those crazy deja vu moments. Normally, I just wonder if I experienced the moment in a dream or perhaps in an alternate reality, but this time I knew exactly where it was from. A year and a half ago, we were in the process of adopting twin toddlers from Ethiopia. After almost a decade [...] 
Several weeks ago, Beth posted a YouCapture challenge with the theme of “A Moment”. Participants were to capture the theme visually, and link their images to share. I wanted to participate. I really did. But, alas, crazy-town has come to stay in my life and I couldn’t get within a mile of a spare moment. In the weeks since, while I’m chasing kids, cleaning dishes, working, breaking up fights and taking accelerated showers, [...] 
As many of you know, in the past year, our lives changed dramatically. In some ways for the good, in others for the uncertain, and many times for the scary. In May of ‘09, our home was invaded by two amazing foster boys: brothers aged 9 and 11. Within minutes of their arrival, we knew life would never be the same. Wild, lively, scared, and curious, our home became a constant whirlwind of [...] 
“Sit. Stay. Stop. Wait… Sit!” He was struggling to gain control as the dog wiggled and sniffed in front of him, nudging the treat in the boy’s hand. “Dad,” he asked. “How do I train a dog to obey me?” The same way you train kids, I thought. Rewards. Bribery. Threats. “Repetition,” Toby replied. The boy stood there, face scrunched in contemplation. Then he took a deep breath, turned back to the dog, [...] 
As I sat next to him, holding his hand while he struggled to fall asleep, my mind could only imagine the thoughts swirling around in his head. It has been a hard summer for these boys; after years of equally difficult seasons. At night, as they will their brains to rest, they toss and turn, leaning toward their hopes of trust and safety, and flinching from bedbugs: memories of disappointment, loneliness, anger, [...] 
Boy – “So, what would you do if you were being chased by zombies?”
Toby – “Well, I suppose I’d put on my invisible suit.”
I’m driving down the road, looking for signs and watching traffic, when suddenly a flurry of activity and cacophony of sound bellowed out of the back seat. “SlugBug! Blue with silver stripes and rims! No returns. No slugbacks. No Time Machine. No Ultimate World 2. No NOTHING!” And that was just for the first person in the car! With lightening speed the same phrase was repeated over and over, each person punched [...] 
When we found her she was a scared little thing, hungry and lonely. After time, her fear gave way to peace and she began loving us unreservedly. Today, she is still dreadfully timid, but quick to welcome and smother us with licks and wags of her tail. They were all much the same. There were six of them, from all over the neighborhood. Each happened to be equally broken: two were abused, [...] |
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